“The Stranger Who Got Me Pregnant”

“The Stranger Who Got Me Pregnant”

Logo for Literary Mama, an online literary journal featuring work about motherhood.

January 2022

This was a mistake, I told myself. 

I’d been ritually repeating that phrase for the eight weeks I’d been pregnant, as the morning sickness became increasingly unbearable. Did cancer patients feel like this, I wondered, as though their bodies had been hijacked by malignant cells? Immediately ashamed of the thought, I still couldn’t escape the feeling that I’d been invaded by a 1.23 cm thing with two arm buds and a pumping heart. The yolk sac I saw on the first ultrasound, attached to a roundish nub the doctor said was the baby’s head, looked like a halo. 

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“Lazarus”

“Lazarus”

SWWIM Everyday literary journal logo

“Lazarus”

SWWIM Everyday, March 1, 2023

When I joked we’ll name him Lazarus
I meant perhaps he was a miracle,
how he stopped growing
and started again…

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